OMG! I Think My Pants Just Ripped

 True story.😒

I decided to wear my favorite button fly jeans for the first time in months yesterday. A raging yeast infection (seriously, WTF?) and a recurring IT Band Issue with my left knee made it tricky to wear anything that wasn't loose fitting and stretchy. Think clown pants maybe?🤡

Luckily it was after we had been and gone to the Cafe but before we made a quick stop to the grocery store for some tomatoes. But best of all I had also worn a knee length sweater. Which I was assured by my son's girlfriend covered my ass completely. I trusted her on that despite the definite breeze on my backside that made it feel as if I was marching into the grocery store wearing nothing but a hospital gown.

The biggest bummer of all was these jeans weren't that old, or even very tight! Oh, and did I mention they were my favorites??

Not only that but it brought up a flood of emotions that included shame, embarrassment, and self loathing. From a similar event that happened to me when I was in middle school. Which was forty years ago.

It was a summer camp for gifted students. Proving at least that I was considered to be smart for one brief shining moment in my life. 

I was walking by the pool table in the Rec. Room when my shorts caught on the corner of the pool table. It was a pair of red shorts with a white stripe on the seam side on the outer sides. Because the 80s. There was a loud rip sound and my thigh was immediately exposed all the way up to the waistband.

As I scurried away trying to rearrange my sweatshirt tied around my waist to cover myself up I distinctly heard one of the boys say "Fat ass" which made my face already burning with embarrassment turn crimson with shame.

Clearly 8th grade boys are known for their empathy and tact.😒

Point being, that as an adult I have been able to put it a bit more in perspective, but I'm still carrying it around with me four decades later.

Which makes me wonder, what else is lurking in the depths of my repressed memories?😕

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